fragileprophet | Week 2, Sunday Post-Execution

Week 2, Sunday Post-Execution - Natsuo

[~~I'm halfway operating under the assumption that Ion's moving into Natsuo's dorm and not the other way around but we'll keep this nebulous for discussion.~~ NEVERMIND they're in Ion's room which is now also Natsuo's room! Wind dorm for life!

But anyway. Ion has a lot of emotional baggage about Sandalphon to work through and Natsuo has a lot of friends, so it probably takes the two of them a decent amount of time to finally end up alone together. When they do, though, as physically and emotionally exhausted as Ion looks, he still smiles for Natsuo.]

It looks like we're partners, now...

[He bows his head politely.]

I hope you'll have me.

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[Ion shakes his head looking down.]

No, I'm sorry, it...

[What is he even doing? This is already such a different, stressful situation, and Ion isn't totally sure he knows the best way to approach it.]

I don't just mean about the game itself. I mean that...

[He falters again, looking sad, and abruptly, his easy smile falls.]

Nevermind. I'm just over-complicating things because I'm upset. I don't really feel pressured to do anything.

[ If it's not pressure, it's something else; the way Ion struggles over what to say and why to say it is very clear, and Natsuo shakes his head vehemently. ]

If you want to say something, then say it! You don't need a reason for it at all- just do what you want. For me, I'll answer any questions you have, 'cause I want you to know about me, and I'll ask you questions too, 'cause I want to know more about you! That's how it works!

[Ion stiffens at the simple honesty of Natsuo's words. It's something he's so...unused to. But, at the same time, it's exactly why he likes him so much. So he balls his fists and nods, shaking off his apprehension.]

Okay! The truth is, I want us to be good friends who don't need to keep anything from each other! I can't tell you anything about myself that's very pleasant to hear, but I still want you to know--so if that's okay, I'm really happy!

[ There's an answer he can get behind. Being good friends is something they've expressed several times already, but there's no step by step approach to it- it's just hanging out and experiencing things together, learning about each other and growing fond of each other. It'll happen in time, so it's not something Natsuo frets over. ]

It's okay! It's more than okay! Stuff about me aren't all very nice either, but I think that's okay too! What I care more about is the you right here and now, so if it's something like the past that's really painful, you don't have to tell me any more than you want. Because I'm friends with the you of right now, not before!

Right!

[But that said, he has no idea where to start, which makes him feel a little embarrass, and his cheeks start to burn.]

You go first--tell me something, and then I'll tell you something, and maybe we can take turns?

Okay!

[ ...But that said, he's a little stuck on where to start too. Like he'd talked with Monika once before, it really does seem like everybody else here is leagues away from the normal high school life he's used to. But there's no impressing anybody here, it's just laying out who he is. ]

I guess for me, I'm an only child, so I was always looking for people to play with. I had a neighbor that refused to let me call him a big brother, but later when I grew up, I had dozens of brothers!

[ gang brothers, but. hmm. ]

Dozens? That's incredible! It sounds like a lot of fun--it's not good being lonely, is it?

[It's one of his least favorite things, so he can understand Natsuo having wanted to find others.]

I don't have any siblings, but I was created along with six other replicas, so it's sort of similar?

[Uh.]

[ Um. No? That's not similar at all. ]

Six isn't a bad number at all! Were they all called Ion?

[Hes. Trying.]

Oh, no...unfortunately they weren't given names before they were destroyed.

[He decided on a snap decision there that "destroyed" was more clinical than "killed" and therefore less awful but, no. Still bad.]

Ah, but I found out somewhat recently that one survived. He calls himself Sync.

[ Natsuo's learning more than he ever wants already ]

Is that Ion? [ He points to the wall— he actually has no idea where the other dorms are, but like. Other Ion. The one not in this room right now. ] His name is Sync?!

[I'm sorry that he unlocked the tragic backstory that he really didn't ask for.]

No, no, he's Ion. The one that I was named after. Sync isn't here--sorry for the confusion.

So... Ion was born first, and you were named after him. But Sync chose his own name, and you didn't want to?

[ Please guide him through this so I can wrap my head around it too ]

[RIP both Natsuo and Card, both dead again so soon. Curse this exposition.]

No...I didn't have a choice.

[This part, he wasn't sure he really wanted to share, but, uh, it might help? Maybe?]

I was born two years ago.

Like Cardia...?

[ Which he also doesn't understand, but that's what somebody told him so it must be true. It doesn't help at all though. ]

Will you keep growing up really fast? I was sort of excited that there's people my age here, so don't keep growing and leave me behind.

I haven't really talked to Cardia, but if she aged rapidly it's a bit different. I actually started with my body already that of a twelve-year-old boy, so I've aged normally to look the way I do now!

[He smiles softly.]

I won't leave you behind at all!

[ All of this continues to sound so fake, but okay!!!

He looks down at his hands. Ten fingers. Two... add two more... ]

So you're fourteen, and I'm sixteen! That makes me your aniki!

[I wish it was fake but this canon is just awful.]

What's an aniki?

[Ion is going to kindly not stop to think about the fact that he had to count 10+2+2 to figure out his age.]

[ Look;; numbers are hard and this is from the person y'all couldn't figure out what 21209 meant. ]

Aniki is a "big brother"! The person in the gang that you look up to and takes care of you!

[Math is hard...I understand...]

Oh!

[There's a pause, and his smile widens.]

I see! Then...should I call you that from now on?

Yeah! I'll be your Aniki, and you'll be my number three! Souji's number two!

[ He's starting a gang ig ]

Okay!

[It's, absolutely fine. Ion's a terrible person to have on any kind of gang but he's going to try his hardest.]

Will you tell me something else about yourself...Aniki?

[ Natsuo is a questionable member himself, and Souji's actively dying, so idk about this gang either

But just hearing himself being called Aniki gives him some sense of responsibility that wasn't there with baseless self-proclamations of protecting everybody. The people in a gang are his, and he has a duty towards them. They start out small, but close, and he'll protect them with his life. ]

I was the banchou of my gang— that's the strongest person. The prefecture I lived in was split into four sections, and I took over and ruled them all! So when I say you can count on me for anything, I mean it, okay?

Wow! You're really powerful--that's amazing!

[His eyes are wide in awed surprise, even. Ion nods.]

I will...I'm in your capable hands, so please take care of me.

[He bows his head again. He has absolute and complete faith in Natsuo.]

[ The capable hands of somebody who'd just died! But maybe they won't target him again, or so soon. Maybe. ]

Of course I will! 'cause you're my brother now. But you know, everybody else in the gang has their own job too, so you won't be let off easy either. You've been making lots of friends around here, right?

I hope so...I've been trying to.

[He just...really likes making friends.]

I'm happy to help in any way that I can! Actually, anything that I can do to pull my weight will make me feel better.

[It's been hard for him to feel like he's incapable.]

Then, all you have to do is keep making friends, and become really good friends with them! A gang is strong if the leader is strong, but when the leader's not there, everybody else has got to be too! So I need you to keep doing that!

[ When he's not here... regardless of whether that's death or isolation or any factor, he's sure that the best way to operate is to build a web of trust. If somebody needs help, everybody will come together to help, and that takes the burden off the leader's shoulder's too, the more people they have. ]

Alright--I'll keep making friends, it's a promise.

[This, he can absolutely get behind.]

But I think you've made the most friends of all...do you have any tips?

Mm, well... There's lots of nice people here, so it's really easy to make friends! Even the ones that tell you to shut up and go away, you just have to keep at it and don't listen to them!

[ The secret to making friends: bully your way there, and eventually they'll relent just to get you off their back ]

It's hard to make friends when you don't know somebody, right? So, you have to keep at it no matter what, and even if somebody doesn't seem friendly, the more you learn about each other, the closer you'll be to becoming friends!

[Fortunately, Ion hears "bully people" as "be a constant support system" so, this is probably going to work out okay.]

That's a wonderful point. Thank you, Aniki. Sometimes I worry that my presence can be troublesome on others...but I shouldn't let myself get discouraged. If you won't give up, I won't either!

[He pauses, and then.]

Oh--I should tell you about my title.

That's right! I'm troublesome too, but I never let that stop me!

[ Maybe he should!! or at least reevaluate his life choices so that he'll be less troublesome for the sake of others, but he won't. ]

I'll listen. You already know mine, right? Somebody always goes up to Tiger or Dragon and makes them blab when we call gather.

[Ion nods.]

Goldilocks, right? I'm sorry that it was put out there for everyone...that must be a frustrating position to be in.

[He looks down at his hands.]

I'm Humpty Dumpy. I have a healing ability, but I have to take on any injury that I heal from others. [He pauses.] That's...why I didn't heal you when you were hurt. I'm sorry. Everyone I'd spoken with about it told me you'd be upset if I did.

I don't care about my title, but yours—! [ He looks conflicted over it. Healing, but having to take on the injuries in the other person's stead, and Ion always looks two seconds from keeling over all the time. ]

Of course I'd be mad! I'm happy you thought of me but I'd be super mad if you did actually did it! Something like that is my fault, so you don't get to take it from me!

[He didn't even go through with it, but he still feels the urge to apologize.]

I just...see others in pain, and when I know there's something I can do to stop it, I can't help myself. I'm glad someone else was able to heal you, in the end. I'm so thankful.

[Here, Ion pauses, thoughtful.]

You missed the trial, so..I can show you the injuries I've taken so far. That way you'll know if I have anything new, and you can yell at me.

[Yelling will not stop him but he's hoping he'll be discouraged.]

Stupid, you don't have to show me! Just tell me and I'll yell at you! I trust you, so I don't need proof!

[ But he'll still yell at Ion, call him stupid and chide him from taking on injuries he really has no business taking. Sometimes pain is good as a reminder, and to be able to heal is something that is very easily taken advantage of. ]

[Ion sighs...but then smiles. Oh, how he wishes it were that simple.]

Alright...as long as you say so. Thank you for believing in me. I guess I don't feel like I really deserve it, but...it makes me feel happy. You're really so kind.

It's not kindness.

[ This feels like a conversation he's had before, and it's weird, because kindness isn't something you're supposed to deny. This? It's not kindness. ]

How come you don't think you deserve it? What'd you do that's so bad?

[He sees kindness in a lot of things his perception of the world ain't so great. Anyway.]

Just worrying everyone so much. I've been going out of my way to get myself hurt...I've upset people, because I kept being told not to use my ability, but I did it anyway, or lied about what it does to me when I use it, hoping to be able to cover it up. Not trusting everyone else in return for the trust they've given me.

[And Ion hates that he'd done it.]

I kept going out of my way to be...self-sacrificial, thinking it was the best thing I could do or the only way I could help, but then...

[But then. His throat tightens.]

Sandalphon did the exact same thing to me. And everyone was right. It's...terrible. I had no idea.

It's terrible and it's stupid- both of you. But that doesn't mean they're the wrong thing to do. What Sandalphon did, he thought it was worth it— to make sure you still had a partner, he thought you were worth it. So if you keep using your power because you think it's worth it, I can hate it but I can't say it's wrong.

[ You live with the consequences of your actions, that's just how it is. Even if Natsuo gets hurt running headfirst into trouble as he does, he'll keep doing it despite the ample scoldings not to, because he thinks it's worth it. ]

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Week 2, Sunday Post-Execution - Natsuo

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